


measured out my life (with caf spoons)

by bittersnake



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, F/M, Miscommunication, background finnrose - Freeform, in which the author...attempts a coffee shop au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-01
Updated: 2018-11-01
Packaged: 2019-08-13 23:15:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,314
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16481609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bittersnake/pseuds/bittersnake
Summary: All Ben Solo wants is a cup of plain caf. The universe feels otherwise.





	measured out my life (with caf spoons)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts).



> I've always wondered why there were no coffee shop aus in like CANONVERSE and this exchange gave me the kick to finally try it.  
> Much thanks to my betas who took the time to look this over as well as bounce ideas off of.

This hurt.

He remembers an old old lesson from his uncle, years ago, when he was young and callow: Desire is not of the Dark Side. Desire is normal and wondrous. It's when it causes harm and destruction, when it's twisted to be cruel, that desire is the road to darkness. He laughed it off then. Part of him couldn't imagine desiring something or someone so much that he would give anything to have it no matter how much hurt it would cause to others. (Another cynical part of him couldn't imagine anyone finding such a odd looking creature-- delicate features obscured by a large nose and ears, a long rangy frame that already overtook both his uncle and father.)

Till now.

"I'm sorry. I know that was probably out of line," a voice says, soft and low. Her voice is usually one of the most pleasing parts of his day, if he was pressed. The body holding the voice looks down, hands wringing, her face pensive and unsure. "I just thought that--- well, you're obviously not coming by for the coffee and Paige mentioned that maybe-- I know it’s hilarious considering you're... well, you," she continues gesturing towards him. "And well, I'm just a nobody from a nowhere planet but--"

"You're not a nobody."

"--and I told her it was ridiculous but--"

He takes her hands in his. Rationally, he knows they're not small hands. Probably average sized for a woman of her height, but next to him she's so so small, her calloused fingers slipping between his. He savors this. Knowing this is probably the last time he can take her hands without guilt coating his soul.

"You're not a nobody to me." She looks up at him, eyes wide. He continues, "And, you're not a nobody to Finn either.”

She blinks.

"Finn is far too good this Force-forsaken excuse of a universe. And he’s the one family member who…. well, he accepts me as I am. I didn’t think anyone could match that until showed up because actual good people are a kriffing myth. But you’re right about me. I am an ungrateful, pedantic snob, and I don’t deserve that acceptance. But you do," he whispers into her hair, softly placing a kiss on her crown. "Be happy."

"Ben, I--," her brow furrows as he gradually increases the space between them. Each step feels like a galaxy between them. She follows quickly, two steps for every one of his.

“Ben, wait--”

Ben turns, unable to bear looking into her haunting eyes anymore. He leaves her apartment, walking out into the underbelly of Coruscant's lower levels.

Alone.

* * *

Ben had no intention of going to the cafe in the first place. He had a 'perfectly good setup' in his office complete with Endorian caf beans, a caf maker he personally constructed as well as Hapan press in case he felt rebellious and wanted to dabble in cold brew. Unfortunately, Finn was also in town and felt that he "needed to stop terrifying your interns and let them have a break from you." Which led them to this….place. 

It was a small store on the middle levels, still high enough up to see the sun. The archway to the store boasted a cheerily painted sign, the letters had obviously been formed with care and it was clean, declaring the shop to be named _The First Crack_. In spite of the duracrete surroundings, someone enterprising had managed to decorate with some planters that contained a random assortment of greenery; some Delia Pavorums; delicately shifting between yellow and blue, some miniature Blueblossom trees; clusters of flowers curling along the side of the shop, and some other local flowers he couldn’t recognize. It was both chaotic and somewhat charming.

"So, like you know how I rarely ask you for anything," Finn's voice pulled him out of his thoughts. 

"Hmm," he said non-committedly staring at the riotous greenery, trying to figure out if that was an actual Alderaanian flame-lily in the mix.

"Well um, sotheresthisgirlandshesreallycuteandiwantyoutonotbeyouforonce--” 

"Excuse me?" 

A deep breath. Ben savored one of the few times his usually confident cousin suffered from inadequacy. (He loves his cousin but honestly he's a bit much.)

"The girl who runs this place," Finn stilled in his stride next to Ben, wringing his hands. "Well, she and her sister work here at this place," he gestures to the caf shop. "They came from one of the Outer Rim moons with her family and they finally,--"

"Is this touching sob story going anywhere?"

Finn pulled a face. "Why are you a Senator again?"

"Because I specialize in disappointing at least one family member at all times with my life choices, and it was time to disappoint the General," Ben replied blithely

"She's not really disappointed in you," Finn sighed.

"And we were discussing your life, not the life of Solo the sole disappointment," Ben said desperately hoping that Finn would steer the conversation back to less rockier terrain.

Finn fixed Ben with a stare but continued on. "Either way, Rose is so so kind and nice and smart and really really cute, and so for once in your life can you not be Ben Organa-Solo and like pretend you're--"

"--not a gifted senator representing Chandrila and youngest sitting member of the Legislative committee?"

"Yes," Finn replied flatly.

"Just, like you're not the esteemed son of Luke Skywalker, savior of the galaxy and grand master Jedi."

Finn turned around and stopped him in his tracks. " _Ben_. " 

He groaned before glaring. "As long as you don't make me drink anything there we'll be fine."

The look on Finn’s face could only be described as “ _I expect better of you”_ also known in some circles as the “Skywalker scowl”.

Ben didn’t flinch. "Finn."

"I may….have mentioned that you like are a huge caf fan,"

"True.

"--and that you love trying out new caf shops and she told me she would love for you to come by to try some of their products," 

"Kriffing hell, you must be in love if you're lying through your teeth like that."

"It wasn't a complete lie, you do love caf for some reason."

"Just because you inherited a palate from a smuggler and a farmer doesn’t mean the rest of us are uncultured--" 

"It's literally bean soup," Finn said rolling his eyes. 

"I will ignore that insult to my soul and remind you that I was perfectly happy to spend the recess in my office."

"Just go inside, you stuck up choob. And be _nice_."

* * *

If pressed, Ben would say the store was adequate. It was obviously not of the same caliber as the bistros he had visited on Lothal, but it had a pleasant atmosphere and a sort of rustic charm to it. That may in part had been due to the young girl humming behind the counter as she set down a tray of pastries -- he never understood why caf shops felt the need to include foodstuff such as pastries with their wares, in his opinion the caf should be a sufficient draw for customers-- into a display case. When she turned back around, he retracted his initial guess of a young girl and replaced it with young woman.

She was on the tallish side for a woman. Not as tall as his Aunt Amilyn, but distinctly taller than his own diminutive mother. Upon nearing the counter, he noted that she was probably on par with his cousin's height -- slender, if he was being charitable and on the scrawny side, if he was not. But her face had a pleasantness to it with dark brows and freckles with her hair partially pulled into a high bun and the rest cascading down her back. Dressed simply, she had no adornment beyond a small name tag pinned to the low collar of her shirt which said "ROSE".


End file.
